I’ve been stress reading this week and read three books this week. Two over the weekend as my stress for next week took over. Sometimes it is easier just to read the world away instead of focusing on essays mixed with medical things for KA.

Having a toddler with sever food allergies is not something I ever thought I would have to deal with. But hey, here we are over 3 years since the first blood test that revealed the severity of it all still just trying to breath.

Usually it isn’t such a big deal for us, our day to day life is pretty solid. But then we have doctors appointments, which turn into different tests and more tests and trying not to make KA afraid of it all. Trying to make everything sound fun and exciting and at the same time I just want to smash everything to pieces. I want to take a baseball bat and break things. But I won’t, because I am almost a 36-year old, calm and a reasonable person. That wants to go and punch the ocean.

Trying to keep my head above the water and still work on group assignments, write essays, be at work, be a functional member of society and not absolutely lose my shit in the middle of the store when the only yogurt they have that she can eat is over a month past it sell by date. I think one day I might snap and go berserk and start throwing old yogurts at the store manager. But I won’t because I am a calm and a reasonable person.

I think the darkness of this winter is just more darker than before. We don’t have snow, which is very VERY nice, but it makes everything a bit darker. So the seasonal depression is hitting hard. Or maybe it is just stress with final assignments mixed with everything else.

Until next week 🙂